The definitions I am providing, are based solely on my own perceptions.
Pride – The complete indulgence in ones ego.
Vulnerability – The act of completely stripping oneself of fear, and instead, consuming oneself with the Art of sincerity.’The way my pride is set up yeah’. A constant phrase we all have become ever so accustomed to.
Need – An intense obligation.
Society at large, or shall I say, our generation, has ventured down the disastrous path, the path of only the ‘strongest’ survive. ‘Show no emotion, feel no pain’ I would say. Deception. who was I deceiving? Inner dialogues on repeat.
Humans, do you not know that pride is fear? The fear of showing ones deep rooted emotions, the fear of being perceived as vulnerable, the fear of exposing the urgency, the desperation, the need of a particular thing, the need of another individual. Unlike the common misconception some individuals in this deranged generation of ours love to parade, I consciously reject the status quo. Yes, I take a different stance.
‘Be a man!’. ‘Man up!’.
Outward expression of emotion, is often misconstrued as weakness. Rather, the male species are expected to follow the social norm, and show nothing but physical strength in an outward manner. A powerful man is not defined by his physical or financial assets. A powerful man is defined by his ability to expose the most intimate part of him. His vulnerability, revealed in its most rawest form, authenticity at its finest. Paired along with the ability to exercise self control. Our good old friend on the other hand, begs to differ. The media and its cunningness neglects my notion, refusing to identify with the very much apparent crisis staring us all in the eyes. Instead, it chooses to plunge down the eternality of deceit and illusions.
We come from a generation that will not bat an eye lid, when declaring the omission to not reach a perverted level of financial success and fame, measures up to complete failure. The media never fails in its duty of reminding the male species that, failure to show strength at all times, belittles oneself to the level of a female. Since the female species are evidently weak creatures, according to the professional study created by our other good friend, society, males should flee from adopting our ‘very sensitive’ behavourisms.
Holding in how we really feel does not just to apply to males, females are also victims. As females we are taught to never give ourselves completely to a man, regardless of the circumstances. This in turn strips away the rawness, authenticity, desperation and urgency of how you really feel internally.
My generation shouts, ‘Five percent max!’. My insides say, ‘One billion percent Jessica, be true to yourself’.’Never give a hundred percent of yourself to a man!’ I was told. It almost became second nature to be repulsed at the site of the opposite gender, a male. Consistently told that as a ‘strong’ woman, monitoring how much one feels should be a norm. I cringed at the mass amount of ignorance. The quantity weakened my spirit. The omission to see the bigger picture. The constant misconstruction that, to feel, is a taboo sickened me. Surely they knew that asking a human not to feel, was equivalent to asking an eczema sufferer not to itch their eczema when it starts to itch?.. Its inevitable.
‘He likes you, use him’.
My heart dropped, sunk at the concept of using another individual to fulfil a selfish want.
I have no notion of loving in halves. I feel nothing but raw desperation. Urgency. I need, I need badly.
Its an exigency. A need for my lover to look me dead in the soul, and tell me how urgently our bodies must meld together. The intense desperation for my lover to utter to me how desperately they need to make love to my inner core being. Failure to do so, and they cease to exist.
‘It’s because your presence consumes me. Might I add, I must and I endeavour to taste the texture of your words in your mouth’. Will this level of intense need be felt by all? No. One of the reasons being, some people feel more deeply than others. However, in some of cases. Failure to show how one feels isn’t based on the fact that the individual cannot feel. Rather, it is based solely on fear.
Out of fear, we are forced to conceal our authentic feelings, emotions, views, thoughts etc. just to protect ourselves. A male cannot show and share how he truly feels, out of fear that his ‘boys’ may make jest out of him. So he swallows it, and goes on with the popular utterance, ‘the way my pride is set up yeah’. A female is forced to constantly ridicule that guy that has nothing but good intentions for her, out of fear of being heartbroken, again.
Common sense should be our first nature, learning from experiences should be a norm. Striving to be genuinely strong souled, strong spirited and strong minded individuals should be on the forefront of our minds. In saying that, do not ever be under any false impression. Acknowledge that, as humans, we are allowed to feel. Moving by unstable feelings, and actually showing emotions are two different things. Remember, mental and emotional instabilities are real.
You feel me?